Confessions of a Chick in Paris

Confessions of a Chick in Paris

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Happy Diwali, Now How Do I De-Sweeten?

October 19, 2009 , , , , , , , ,

diwali2Just passing through to note the occasion of another Diwali. The festival of lights, the triumph of good versus evil, in short the most significant festival in India.

What troubled me about this holiday though, was that a lot of people had fireworks within our extended neighbourhood. Trust me, I LOVE fireworks, and I beamed as they lit up the night sky. I beamed even more when my dad called us out into the yard.

“Let’s start the fireworks. Get the camera!”

We stood there huddled by the open screen door, waiting for the lights to blind and the crackles to deafen.

It began and our hearts started racing. The explosion of flaming lights on our patio grew taller. Two feet. Four feet.

It was the warm-up ’till the hundred-foot blast.

Four feet.

Four feet.

And then lights out, the flame is dead.

“Come on now, keep watching. I have three more!”

“Are they the same as the last one dad?”

“Yes they’re the same, enjoy all the colours!”

Uhh…okay.

Not to be a fireworks snob, but I was waiting for the hardcore shit that Apu sells to Homer Simpson in the Kwik-E Mart. You know the stuff that he’s hiding in the back. Like the firework rockets.

No rockets here.

The fireworks disappointment I can deal with, but how do I deal with the sheer amount of sugar I consumed in the last two days? The Indian sweets, the syrupy delights…my god the translucent syrup.

Scientifically-speaking, I’m thinking that the best way to neutralize sugar, is to eat a ton of salty food, exclusively. For the next twenty-four hours.

I don’t have a doctor’s note to confirm it, but I’m pretty sure I got an A- in high school Chemistry.

Now someone pass the sodium chloride and let’s get this party started…

letterR2

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comments

I’ve eaten so much I’ve felt like my guts were going to be sent catapulting out of every orifice on my body, I always self prescribe MORE food to combat all the food consumed earlier…It befuddles me, but fighting food with food always seems like a smart idea at the time.

Good luck with your salty diet!

Shweta

October 19, 2009

the saltiness was not the best idea…now i’m just trying to fight food with exercise 😉

Romi

November 2, 2009

I can definitely relate–it’s hard to find the fun fireworks in the U.S. too. Their use is regulated by local governments, not the Feds. Here in Escambia County, Florida, they don’t sell any of the fun stuff. We have to go to Baldwin County, Alabama to get that. Of course the fun stuff is illegal to light here, but so many people do this that the law is unenforcible! I remember when I was a little boy, and all fireworks were illegal in the City of Mobile. My brother had a grocery bag full of smuggled firecrackers and other fun fireworks. We were at a neighbor’s house, and I asked him what we’d do if the police came. He said “run like hell”–it was hilarious! My favorites are firecrackers, M-60’s, M-80’s, bottle rockets, and Roman candles. Of course they’re dangerous, but what fun is life if there is no danger?

Scott

October 19, 2009

Hi scott, it is ALL about the dangerous fireworks that soar up high, anything else is just pansy 😉

Romi

November 2, 2009

fireworks scare the sh*t out of me. I am such a wuss.

geminigirl64

October 19, 2009

don’t worry you’re not a wuss, we can just get you some streamers or something…lol 😀

Romi

November 2, 2009

Haha! I was cracking up about the salt thing. Just have some water too…I don’t want you killing yourself.

Jen512

October 21, 2009

Yeah suprisingly excess amounts of salt is not a good combative plan 😉

Romi

November 2, 2009

I laughed the entire time. Yeah, the fireworks here in NC aren’t much better. We have to smuggle the good stuff in from South Carolina.

Salt counteracting sugar? hmmm… I’ll check the periodic table and get back to you on that one

rachelhamm

October 22, 2009

glad you could have a laugh and don’t you DARE check the periodic table. NO ONE questions my scientific methods… 😉

Romi

November 2, 2009

Definitely. Salty food must follow sugary food. Or vice-versa. Either way. It’s a known fact among women of child-bearing age and is especially effective during PMS. 😉

teeni

October 23, 2009

sigh…I was soooo PMSing at the time…LOL…is that too much info? 😉

Romi

November 2, 2009

Did you see Dutch? That great comedy starring Ed O’Neill aka Al Bundy? The fireworks scene is hilarious… I bet you wished for some fun like that, huh? Here’s to the next Diwali/sugary food binge!

Duffboy

October 23, 2009

I have not seen Dutch, but I am loving good ol’ Al Bundy in the Modern Family show 🙂 Have you seen that?

Romi

November 2, 2009

Hey Romi! I hate fireworks. I just don’t get how pretty explosions are celebratory of anything and I don’t like loud banging noises either. But I don’t want to rain on your Diwali parade. What an interesting holiday (thanks for the Wiki link). Some parallels to the Jewish festival of lights Wikipediaarticle on Chanukah.

And I would not suggest salt to counteract the sweets but sour instead. So go have a pickle. 🙂

David

October 25, 2009

OMG…sour, why didn’t I think of that? Obviously that was the REAL opposite..you’re quite handy to have around David…lol 😉

Romi

November 2, 2009

I feel pity for arteries, don’t eat all that salt.

Kerplar

October 29, 2009

I’m trying to turn that trainwreck around now, don’t worry 😉

Romi

November 2, 2009

I am devestated your firework watching did not pan out 😦 But we will always have the 4th of July….uuhh wait do you celebrate our Independence in Canada?????? I’m going to pertend that yes you do (lol ;))just for the sheer fact that the celebration is always puncuated with the awe inspiring lights and sounds of fireworks. Also, don’t believe Kerplar…eat the salt I’m positive your chemistry is dead on! Have a stunning weekend!

sammy25

October 29, 2009

LOL…NO we do not celebrate YOUR Independence Day, damn you! We have Canada Day on July 1st, celebrating our country since 1867 😉

Romi

November 2, 2009

I wish I got to light fireworks this time of year, I get jealous watching Omni. Would I be weird if I celebrated everyones holidays and just showed up in various neighbourhoods demanding sweets, perogies, chocolate gold coins, and whatever anyone has going on? And doood, of course salty foods cancel out the sweets, evvvvverybody knows that 😉

Emerald

October 29, 2009

OMG…I love you automatically because you mentioned Omni! Hahaha 😉

and lol…I want to be part of the group that has the gold chocolate coins 😉

Romi

November 2, 2009

thanks for visiting teendudes, and it is quite the joyous festival, all are welcome to join in 😉

Romi

November 2, 2009

You’re fucking A, I love your sense of humour. Great article too, being white, british diwali just wakes me up but I appreciate the colours. I have super-sensitive hearing so the sounds just hurt my ears.

Misanthropist

April 28, 2010

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